When I fell pregnant with my first daughter, I had these expectations of having loads of “mummy friends” and I was quite lucky because I had a few friends from school who had just had babies or were due around the same time as me, but I slowly realised that a lot of my friends disappeared and being a new mum was relatively lonely.
It became worse as my daughter got older and I slowed down on the mother baby groups I went to, which incidentally I found were very clicky and if you didn’t fit into the group you were made to feel like an outcast. Or is that just my opinion of the groups in my area?
We all got caught up in our own lives and trying to juggle being parents, work, social life (none existent) etc and I just kind of dealt with it.
However now I have my second daughter and I’m older I can honestly count my close friends on one hand, which makes me realise just how lonely and secluded I have become.
Don’t get me wrong there is a group of us who all stand together at school, and yes it is a proper little mothers meeting of about 8 of us, but that’s the only time I see these other women, I’m not in constant contact with them and we don’t organise social gatherings with each other etc.
When I became a mum I had this notion that I would have all these coffee mornings and my children would have endless play dates and we would forever be around each other’s houses swapping tips, giving advice, laughing and even crying together. When in actual fact the majority of the time, I feel that I am going it alone and there isn’t this sense of support of one another.
I wonder where I got this silly idea that being a parent would broaden my friendship circle, when in actual fact it made it the smallest it has ever been.
Did this happen to anybody else and did you have expectations of play dates and coffee morning galore?